when I put baby boy to sleep at night,
he sleeps for about 45 minutes,
and then wakes.
I leave him for awhile,
letting him cry,
thinking he will go back to sleep.
But usually he doesn't.
He only does this at night,
this little: cry after you put me down routine.
Not during the day,
when he naps.
And I've begun to wonder,
if at night,
he just needs one more assurance that we are here.
That if he cries, we will come.
And that there are long hours ahead when we will sleep in separate rooms,
so will you hold me one more time?
I go to him,
nurse him a little more,
and then put him back in his bed.
Sometimes he goes right back to sleep,
sometimes he cries again...
but not for long,
and then he rests.
Since becoming a parent,
I've often thought on how God parents us.
And I know our fathering and our mothering is nothing like His,
but I know there are times when I cry in the night,
because I need to know He is still around,
just in the next room,
and will come when I cry.
And what I find so magical is that He tells me:
I never left the room.