She told me she loved me

Friends from home 

came to visit

and left yesterday.

Today

I cleaned the house

washed the sheets

the towels

the floor.

Sweeping away the remnants

of them

and trying to straighten my life

back to the way it was before

they came

and left.

I ran an errand,

retail therapy,

as a way of forgetting

and bought a sugar bowl

so I'd have one for their next visit.

And 

in the middle of that store

in the middle of my missing

and wishing for another trip,

my Sophie-girl

stood in the shopping cart

wrapped her 2 year old arms around me and said:

I love you, mommy.

It was the first time she'd ever said it,

all on her own

without me saying it before her.

And

it all slipped away

the missing

the wishing

the hoping

the sighing

the tears.

In my arms

I knew

I held

the only memory

I really need.